Friday, August 21, 2009

~LOLing With Kijiji~


One of my favorite things to do is read through Kijiji ads. Sure, 90% of them are normal and lovely, but the 10% of sick, weird or stupid posts makes it worth the time to root through. Here are some that I came across this morning:




Wanted: Looking for a personal loan
Address:
Edmonton
Date Listed: 15-Aug-09

my name is clayton I just started a new job I need a personal loan asap of about $15000 contact clayton @ 780-239-8302


Wow! What a great deal for us readers! You guys better contact him before I do. I like how he thinks he can just sort of demand a loan and get people flocking to the phone???


brad
Address:
Edmonton, AB, T5J 4J5
Date Listed: 27-Jul-09

hey im brad i need a part time job i can only work after 5 and on weekends becuse i am in the army just need some extra cash

I just like that the subject line of this really professional "Looking for Work" advertisement is "brad." hahaha. Also, NO capital letters used in the ad. Good work, brad.


just hade a babie i need a better job looking 4offers
Address:
Edmonton, AB, T5W 3G2
Date Listed: 28-Jun-09

my name is mike im 24 i work hard and and i can do allmost anything i lern fast to .i dont have a truck but i can get to ware i need to go.ill do whatever you need done or help with i have exp with all tools jackhammerrs ect . have done small concrete jobs fences gradge doors 1 year taping litthe rusty thair . bording all sorts of stuff . i want fulltime long hours and if possable sum overtime if you are contacting me i will not go into marketing so dont bother i am looking pay 4 hours
mike 780 660 5506

Do I really need to explain why this one is funny?? I might go to hell for making fun of this new-father down on his luck... but does he not have Microsoft Word??? You know, spell check??? Perhaps a caps lock key??? ughhhh. Terrible terrible terrible. And it's spelled BABY. B-A-B-Y. You just had a BABY. Also, "i lern fast to" ??? goodbye.

And here are a couple of "Missed Connections" ads:


walmart clairview
Location:
Edmonton Region Edmonton
Date Listed: 18-Aug-09

very busty older lady i smiled want to meet u im the 44 year old guy brn hair its a shot in the dark but i must try thanks.

hahahahaha. Sick.



I really like this "Missed Connection":

Purple/bluish pigeon at Sir Winston Churchill Square - 05-Aug-09
Location:
Edmonton Region Edmonton
Date Listed: 07-Aug-09

I was on my to work, you were picking bread crumbs off the ground. Our eyes locked for a second...and then a few more gazes. I really wanted to feed you bird seed, but didn't have any and was late for a board meeting. I went back on Thursday, but didn't see you. Brought seeds but alas, no such luck. All alone with the other birds. Do pigeons migrate? Have you gone South to Cabo San Lucas for the winter. Please respond. I know we could have something special.


6 comments:

  1. gradge doors? I had to sound this out out loud to discover what he meant! oh lordy.

    I love reading the personals for casual encounters. I'm sure that means I'm a pervert, but it's interesting!

    LOOK HERE IT IS LADIES...

    I'M JUST GONNA GET STRAIGHT TO THE POINT.
    I AM A 30 YEAR OLD EXTREMELY FIT, EXTREMELY INTELLIGENT GOOD-LOOKING WHITE MALE WITH A VERY BRIGHT FUTURE.. I ENDED A SERIOUS 8 YEAR RELATIONSHIP A YEAR AGO. I DESIRE TO FIND A WOMEN WHO CAN SWIM IN THE DEEP WATERS OF LIFE, MOST WOMEN AREN'T SECURE, OR READY FOR THE THINGS I OFFER, & I'M GETTING VERY DISCOURAGED & LONELY.
    ARE YOU READY FOR SOMETHING REAL? ARE YOU SOLID ENOUGH IN WHO YOU ARE TO SWIM IN THESE DEEP WATERS? HOW DESERVING DO YOU THINK YOU ARE???

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  2. HAHAHAHA. Sick!

    I LOVE reading the casual encounters, too!!!!!!!!!

    p.s. I am VERY deserving of swimming in the deep waters!!! ... also, I do not know what that means.

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  3. pps. I didn't know what "gradge doors" meant until you said it. ugghhhhhhhh. hahahahaaaaaa.

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  5. "1 year taping litthe rusty thair" Mike!!! I can't understand you. ps: i think i hear the babie crying!!!! pps: see you in hell

    ppps: look at me I'm commenting on your blog :DDDD

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  6. I know I'm SUPER late on these comments, but that pigeon one made me LOL LOL LOLz! UGHGHGHGH! Can you find out who that stupid idiot is so we can all strangle him/her?

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