On this, the eve that Barack Obama was elected President of the United States of America, I sit here contemplating the world. I hold in my right hand a steaming cup of hot cocoa ... and in my left, I grasp hope for the future.
I've concluded that the best news to come out of any of this - even better than the whole "making history" thing and the "promise of change" - is the beautiful fact that we're not going to lose Akon.
Am I right? We dodged a real bullet there, people.