Having worked in many an office over the years, I have encountered many an annoying cubicle-neighbor. Here is a list of behaviors that you should avoid at all costs in an office environment:
Inappropriate Office Behavior
- Slurping your beverage (hey, man, we all get thirsty. But I shouldn't hear every single droplet going down your gullet.)
- Chewing and smacking your food loudly (normal eating sounds are fine, but when you’re adding in LIP SMACKS, loud, wet tongues or sound effects, you’ve gone too far.)
- Making bad office jokes
- Making the SAME bad office joke more than once
- Making the SAME bad office joke on more than one occasion on multiple days
- Asking time-related questions that we all know the answer to (e.g. “Is it lunchtime yet?”, “Is it Friday yet?” and “It’s five o’clock somewhere, am I right?”*)
*saying these are only acceptable when said with a twinkle in one’s eye.
- Taking a newspaper into the bathroom with you
- Talking on a cell phone in a bathroom stall
- Playing Bon Jovi's "Dead or Alive" on your office iPod more than three times per day
- Talking to yourself. This includes all forms of whispering, laughing and encouraging words (e.g. "OKAY, Let's get goin' here, Brian!")
Avoid all of these inappropriate office behaviors and you will make many friend!